After much thinking and mind-wrenching inner dialogue, I have decided not to invite one of my current roommates to return to TheRealHouse as we embark upon “Season Two.”
This means that I’ve told one of my roommates that I no longer want them living in the house.
It would be easier if she was a bad person. If she kicked me in the shins when I walked by…or left decanters of sacrificial lamb’s blood in the living room.
It’s nothing nearly as black and white. She is a wonderful person. I have enjoyed living with her. I have learned from her.
But we are very different people.
Our backgrounds, value systems, and passions are worlds apart.
And, while I have enjoyed the diversity aspect of living with her for the last 8 months, I’m ready to try something different. I’m ready to focus more. And for the places I want to go, it requires a more unified vision.
I know that this may sound harsh to some. Some may even think it is hypocritical of me.
But I see this House project as an important artistic endeavor. Each participant is a cast member is a larger production. Since I am serving as director, I have to make sure each cast member is contributing to the overall vision.
If I wanted to cast “Riverdance,” I’d have to let the Tuba player go.
He may be an incredible musician, but he simply isn’t in line with the kind of music I want to be playing.
As any performer has to learn, being wrong for the part doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with you.
Are these metaphors making helping? Or simply making this already difficult situation more convoluted?
This has not been easy for me. Part of me wanted to just continue on and do the best we can. But another part of me knows that “good enough” is a far cry from excellence.
I want to be a part of something amazing. Something historic. I want people to walk in the doors of TheRealHouse and smell the moist creative energy dripping from the walls.
I want to inspire people. I want to inspire myself.
"I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference."