Sometimes I have death fantasies.
I imagine that there is nothing that I can achieve in my life that my death wouldn’t achieve better.
I imagine that the work that I flounder with suddenly is taken seriously. I imagine being referred to as a pioneer of the Internet. I imagine that my attempts of spreading compassion are embraced the world over.
Because the founder died, HugNation becomes a news item…then a movement.
The death fantasy makes it into a nice clean inspiring story.
But if I stay alive, I have countless opportunities to fail.
I’m not proud of the fantasy…and I have no desire to not be alive…but I do imagine it sometimes.