(stream of consciousness)
Wild mind today.
Black ink clouds ran across my thoughts�smearing my perspective.
The wind whispers, �You can�t.�
-A project struggle.
-Raised voices between lovers.
I am at an ageless crossroads:
Struggle through? or back away?
I realize that I too often back away. Too uncomfortable with the conflict. Too afraid of the hardship.
Too afraid of FAILURE.
There�s the wind again, listen�
�You can�t.�
Perhaps I should put some music on. To remind me to dance and stop listening to that nasty wind.
So much to dance about.
But, a body isn�t built to dance all night. A body needs rest. A body needs breaks from the dance.
I guess a mind does, too.
Learned of a friend�s death today. Motorcycle weekend crash.
New friend. A Lustmonkey with smiles to spare.
Shocked. Can only see him living. Not dead.
So permanent.
Dear god, so much to dance about!
Thank you for the gift of sorrow.
This consciousness, even in its straining depths, is such a gift.
Let go of the doubt.
Let go of the wind.
You can. You can because you have no choice�
You are.
Dance with me, Buddha. Move me. Let me be your windsock. Flutter through me.
Stop steering.
With spirit as with dance�let go.
�